We Built The Ultimate Pain Cave

We can all dream, right? (Credit: Wahoo)

As our outdoor activity is restricted, the most important thing for any cyclist right now is their indoor training setup, otherwise known as the ‘pain cave’. From genius space management in tiny flats to wholesale loft and basement conversions, we’ve seen some truly fantastic pain caves. But what would the ultimate indoor cycling setup look like? Well, let's pretend we exist in a world with no limits so we can show you all the things we would kit our pain cave out with, MTV Cribs style.  

The cave

Luxury shed for cycling
Pimp my shed (Credit: Green Retreats)

If you have the luxury of spare space, the first thing to focus on is the cave itself. How about taking a leaf out of ex professional Dean Downing’s book and getting a shed purpose built specifically for indoor cycling. There are many bespoke shed builders dotted around the country so this is where, in our ideal world, we would start.

The trainer

Wahoo KICKR Bike
The KICKR Bike is Wahoo's top of the range smart bike (Credit: Wahoo)

After the pain cave itself the most important thing for indoor training is of course a smart trainer. Some of the best brands include Wahoo and Tacx. Decking out the shed with all the mod cons from these brands is our next step, including the trainer itself, climbing grade simulators, mats and protective towels. After this is installed, we would pair the trainer to a system like Zwift to make sure we are getting the most out of our training and workouts. We basically want the entire catalogue in our pain cave.

Entertainment  

Imagine having Bang & Olufsen's Beoplay A9 speaker in your turbo room (Credit: Bang & Olufsen)

Next, we need to hook our trainer app up to something super high-tech so that we can fully immerse ourselves in the workout. How does a curved television screen sound? With Zwift running on that, it will truly feel like we’re riding in the made-up land of Watopia. We will also need a superior sound system to play our workout playlist on. Although it will probably cost more than your bike, the Bang & Olufsen A9 Speaker will even have the International Space Station rocking to your tunes. Entertainment, whether it’s music, podcasts or Netflix, is important when indoor training because it keeps us motivated and hitting all our goals. You’re more likely to keep training If you’re not getting bored.

Décor

This jersey signed by Bradley Wiggins would help keep your motivation levels up (Available here)

As well as a television and music to keep us motivated while riding, there’s nothing more inspiring than some memorabilia. This signed Bradley Wiggins yellow jersey for example should take pride of place in any pain cave and help you dream impossible dreams.

Cooling systems

A 24 inch drum fan would keep you perfectly cool

As we’ve said before, cooling systems are really important when riding indoors. You can overheat very quickly even in the winter months, so fans are crucial to help you stay cool and to circulate through the training space. As this is the ultimate pain cave, we don’t want just any old fan. This huge 24-inch drum fan used to ventilate factories and barns should do the trick. We’ll also need drinks on the go to keep us cool, and lots of them, an indoor chilled display stuffed full of chilled bottles is very pro.

Staying loose

How about your own masseuse on hand after each session?

How about hiring a sports masseuse for when the sessions get particularly strenuous? The pros get one after every stage of a race so why shouldn’t we?

And one we made up

Group ride scented candle anyone?

To make this pain cave truly unique, we thought we should invent a product to take indoor training to a whole new level. To keep the shed, basement, spare room or loft smelling ‘fresh’ we think a cycling specific air freshener is called for. As you’re riding along indoors the air freshener will fire out smells from your fellow sweaty riders, the mountain air, the melting tarmac, the team car’s diesel engine, the fans’ pyrotechnics and beer, chamois cream and of course, it will even sound the odd horn. It’ll be just like riding up an Alpine pass, over the Poggio or into the Roubaix velodrome for one last lap.


What does your pain cave look like? Feel free to share them with us on our Instagram. For more home riding guidance make sure to check out our earlier articles Ultimate Indoor Cycling Hacks and 9 Tips To Maximise Your Indoor Cycling.

Now you may have more time to, it’s also worth looking at our cycle insurance policies. Pedalsure can insure all of your bikes and accessories and cover them even in your home. The fact is, you won’t find many of the things we cover in your typical home insurance policies. Taking out a policy with us means that your bike is protected in cases of theft and damage. Pedalsure can also protect you, your bike and your accessories in mass participation events and races, in cases of personal injury, personal liability and when you are travelling abroad. Getting yourself set up with a Pedalsure policy is something you only have to do once a year, but you benefit from on every ride.

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